The ending caught me off guard. The image of the child crying outside the bathroom door transforms, years later, into the adult realizing that the same closed door is now theirs to open. Such a quiet way of showing how our earliest longings keep echoing through us. Beautifully understated.
For so generous a reader as your kind self, this poetry packs a wallop! How quickly it turns from a mildly humorous occasion to the cold seawater of aging and distance. Powerful!
When I got my first electric guitar at age 14 I'd hammer the chords to "Are You Ready" by Grand Funk while my younger sister pounded on my bedroom door pleading to Turn It Down. So did you go next door and kick the kid's keister? Or dance?
The ending caught me off guard. The image of the child crying outside the bathroom door transforms, years later, into the adult realizing that the same closed door is now theirs to open. Such a quiet way of showing how our earliest longings keep echoing through us. Beautifully understated.
Thank you, Antonio, for your careful and generous reading. Somehow those ancient hurts keep reappearing in search of resolution,
So much here! The fish and the swimming, nightmares, approximately, and more. Reading it again and again.
Thank you, Martin!
For so generous a reader as your kind self, this poetry packs a wallop! How quickly it turns from a mildly humorous occasion to the cold seawater of aging and distance. Powerful!
Thank you, Joe!
Wow, Nora. How feelings and a nervous system crash out into the present. Left gasping too.
A bit scary too, Richard! Thanks for your support!
as always Nora, effortless understatement and with the wonderful pathos ending spins the brain around and says hey check this out…beautiful work 💛👌😘
Thanks a million, Sea! You made my day! 💕✨💕
Those last lines made me gasp!
Thanks, Ray!!!
Great closing, Ray. Also, the reference to Dick Dale set a perfect background and soundtrack for the piece. Good poem.
Thank you!
When I got my first electric guitar at age 14 I'd hammer the chords to "Are You Ready" by Grand Funk while my younger sister pounded on my bedroom door pleading to Turn It Down. So did you go next door and kick the kid's keister? Or dance?
Oh, dance, of course! He’s getting better all the time! Thanks for reading, Brendan.
Wonderfully done and the ending really arrives powerfully though really catches you almost unaware. Great writing.
Gary, thank you so much! I appreciate your reading and commenting
Nora, those second and third verses made my eyes open wide with pleasure! Such interesting sustained images and thought :)
Thank you so much, Rhea! I appreciate your opinion very much 💕
Beautiful ending, Nora!
The way this moves from a neighbor’s bass guitar to childhood longing is brilliant. So much emotion held in such a small space. I love this! <3
Thank you so much, Petra!! 💕💕
My pleasure! <3